I can't take it anymore...I am so tired, I can't take it...Everything just burst, everything is just so tiring. I...I don't know what to do, everything just burst, everything just exploded, What the hell happened? Everything that has been caged inside for so long has suddenly exploded. So much pain and hurt, in everything, every swallow, every blink, every movement. What happened? I know that there are still more things inside of me that is yet to explode, I know that what just happened now what only a fraction of what has been held inside, it was too long, everything was caged in so long. It was a mistake, none of that was suppose to come out, I was just so stressed with all the school work and social life that I...everything has came out without me knowing, none of it was suppose to come out. I just can't believe that I had held everything in for so long. I understand now what it means when people tell me not to put everything inside of me, not telling anymore but just keeping it in my heart. I just can't believe that I just...burst! It was painful, horrifying and terrible. Everything I blurted out every tear that dropped down my cheeks, it made me more terrified then ever, I didn't even understand myself that i have kept things in for so long. That I have been in pain so many times yet it just stayed in my heart, not telling anyone, just forever imprisoned til the day i burst. How is it even possible that things like that is..possible? A lot of times I tell myself that I had nothing left to complain about, yet right now my throat it's so dry with just the thought of that... myself close to tears again. I didn't even know myself that i had so many things that i was unhappy about, so many things that i have kept to myself, never telling, never complaining.
No one understands so I don't tell anyone, and I just wait...wait for my pain to build up again, wait til my life is so sorrowful I can't breathe, wait til my tears fall without permission wait til I can't see as the tears build up around my eyes, and slowly fall as I cry so hard I cannot breathe, wait til my heart hurts with every breathe and every move...
...wait til I burst once again...
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